16
Jul
“The average girl goes through heartbreak at least once in her lifetime and today I went through mine. I woke up this morning and all that came to mind is this wonderful person that was once in my life. As I was alone in the cold, I watched the sunrise, the grass wet with dew, and the disturbing silence as I walked to class feeling the burning stares from familiar faces. As I sat in my seat, my mind began to drift, replaying the moments we shared. Soon everything around became blurred and all I can see is the picture of him and I; what we used to be. Passing 5th period I saw him from afar; hand in hand with another girl, their fingers intertwined just as ours used to. My eyes feasted on her, knowing that she has replaced me was unbearable. I began to tear, the life around me soon felt empty and I had no more reason to live . Hatred ran through my veins while in my mind I asked “What did I do to deserve such pain?” When the bell rang for 7th, I knew the time had come. My steps became heavier as if the weight of the world was on my shoulders. With each step it was mere torture and my hands became numb from the breeze of the wind. “Did you love me? If so, then why do this to me? Was my love not good enough? We’ve gone through so much, why let it end this way? I can’t do this, please don’t make me.” The defining moment was when I saw him smiling. It killed me to see him with such a bright smile, knowing that I wasn’t the one to put it there. At the end of the day, I was relieved that I could finally have the comfort of my bed. I hid under my sheets, ashamed of the world to see me at my lowest. With “Stick with you” by the Pussy Cat Dolls fading in the distance, taunting me with memories of what we had, my body finally gave in and my eyes were shut closed for what I wished was forever. Hours later, I was awoken by the sound of my alarm clock, too tired to open my eyes, I turned to the cold side of my pillow to refresh me for the morning. As I laid, feeling as if he was there and ready to greet me, with a faint smile, I whispered “I love you,” once more. But when I opened my eyes, he wasn’t there.”
- something I wrote in my livejournal awhile back.
